Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Beer, Sunshine, and the Shark-Infested Waters of Northern California


As to your inquiries into my recent whereabouts, I can only respond with assurances that all is well in my current place in the world, having returned, bloodied, bruised and triumphant, from a weekend that tested the fortitude of both my stomach and liver.

Responding to the call of other like-minded adventurers, I made the journey from my humble abode to the sun-swept and rugged coastline of Northern California in general, and Santa Cruz in particular, with a heart-felt and sincere desire to make something of both the Memorial Day weekend, of which so many of America's sons and daughters have passed before their time in order to make this a better country for us all, and of course, to make something of myself.

Several important dates, in addition to the aforementioned holiday would must be remembered, honored, and respected, not least of which was the birthdays of close friends and family.  Many animals were slaughtered and consumed, and much drink was passed from friend to friend, culminating in a riotous celebration of life, adventure, and testicular fortitude.

We did not pass through such an event unscathed, as the burnt skin from the hot sun, damage to our individual purifying organs, and sheer exhaustion from lack of sleep would make clear, but true voyagers in this thing called life of course realize that our time here is borrowed, not owned, and that at times, short-term memory loss must be sacrificed for the greater good of long-term memory gain, and scars well-earned from honorable battle are not to be hid, but worn proudly for all to see.  It is not just from the writings or teachings of the elders that we learn, but from our own experiences, struggles, passions and failures.

And while we have all returned to our current places of dutiful employment by now, we are left with the memories of our battle, the peeling skin from our burnt hides, a hangover by which to remember the struggle, and hazy memories dutifully captured by some enterprising and slightly more sober individual who remembered that someone must record this shit-show.

Happy Memorial Day


Clara said...

Not to rain on your glorious parade, but by "shark-infested," don't you mean "otter"? And please elaborate on this battle scar business, because that is a memory that is so far beyond my realm of hazy, as to venture into the land of Lies, You Has Them.... ;)

Venom said...

Re: Shit-Show on tape/film --

Do you ever wonder if these things will be used against you sometime in the future?

Alison said...

Testicular fortitude??

Martin said...

Clara - There may have been some exaggerations in there...if you want to be a jerk about it :(

Venom - Most of them are up on facebook already. Nothing posted thus far would prevent me from running for office in the future. Party pictures didn't GW Jr.

Alison - Erm...Yes. I think I have mentioned that before, no?

Annabelle said...

Two words: aloe vera.

linda said...

lol clara made me laugh. outing you on otters eh?

your peeled skin is your red badge of courage. i get it

Clara said...

Oooh, fine. I guess I will have to concede that the babe's couldn't seem to get enough of Martin's balls--literally: the toddler's on the beach were mesmorized by his football skills--it was adorable!

Lissa said...

Glad you had fun! :D

Alison said... Care to elaborate?

Martin said...

Annabelle - That's for women

Linda - I'm glad SOMEBODY does

Clara - I has skills. Yes.

Lissa - Thanks!

Alison - No...No, I don't think I should.

Anonymous said...

I like how you blocked out all of the obvious digs and slights and zeroed in on the single, two-word phrase that unintentionally implied "victory." You have GOT to teach me how to do that!

Juliana said...

you're my hero.

like the new heading.

Martin said...

Anonymous - It's easy. ONLY pay attention to the parts that are complimentary. :)

Juuuu - Thanks :)

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